How To Deal With A Toddler Who Doesn't Like Sharing?
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As a parent of a toddler you'll encounter a situation
sooner or later when your toddler doesn't like to share. He or she
doesn't want to share toys, your attention or the playground slide. What
can you do as a parent to help your toddler to learn and accept the
concept of sharing?
The first thing you should know is that your toddler is experiencing a
very normal part of development. Even the most reasonable of toddlers
will not want to share their precious things at some point.
As embarrassing or difficult as this can be don’t get too discouraged by
their behavior and certainly don’t blame yourself or your parenting
skills. Take comfort in knowing that this is simply part of your
toddler’s development and is helping her prepare for her next stage of
life.
The good news is you can gently deter this situation even before it
starts. Here are a few tips:
Distraction Technique - Distract your child with another toy or ask her
to come and join you to play on the swings, etc. without making a big
deal about sharing. This will often work as toddlers get bored quickly
and she’ll probably appreciate the distraction.
Nip it in the Bud – Anytime two toddlers are playing together it’s best
to keep a close eye on things. As soon as you see a potential situation
about to erupt, dive in there and break it up. Tempt your child with a
more interesting toy or show them a fun new game.
If your child is playing nicely and another child is trying to take her
things then distract that child. Find something similar or a close
replacement to what your child has and offer it to them. Tell them how
great it is, of course, don’t overdo it or then you’ll have two toddlers
fighting over this new and wonderful toy you’re talking about.
Walk Away – If things get really bad and your child refuses to give back
a toy to their crying owner then it’s time to take action. Gently pick
up your child and walk away. They may kick and scream but remember YOU
are in charge. Take him to a quite corner or space and wait for him to
calm down. Then give him a hug and explain that you know he really
wanted that toy but that it belongs to someone else.
Chances are your child isn’t going to understand or accept the meaning
of this but you’ve now diffused the situation and can continue to play
happily.
The Aftermath – After the fact it’s great to talk things over with your
child and explain why it’s important to share, but be realistic. Most
toddlers won’t understand the concept of sharing or why they should do
it and all the talking in the world isn’t going to change things.
As your child starts to mature that’s the time when it’s more
appropriate to try and reason with them since they will start to have an
understanding of actions and consequences. During the toddler years that
understanding isn’t there.
The best way is often to avoid and / or distract your toddler. This will
help diffuse
a lot of incidents before they even start.
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