This is part two of our series on moving…

Moving can be a stressful time for everyone. Children have a special need to be able to process the change. Here are some things you can do to make the transition from one house to another smoother.

1. Keep it positive

It may be tempting to complain – after all, what with moving sales, cleaning, preparing the new house and so on, things can get hectic and difficult. Try to keep it upbeat and positive, talking about the move as an exciting adventure.

2. Talk early and often

Don’t wait until you are packing up boxes to explain to your children what is going on. Include them in the moving plans from the beginning, presenting it as something positive. They may or may not like the idea, but be patient and continue to involve them and encourage them to talk to you about it.

3. Don’t be afraid of children’s big feelings

Your children may really dislike the idea of moving. They may be afraid of change, and being uprooted from their house can make children feel insecure. Let them express these feelings in constructive ways, such as drawing or writing a story. Encourage them to talk about their negative feelings and be sure not to tell them their feelings are wrong, or that they “shouldn’t” feel that way. Just listen and validate.

4. Don’t make any promises

Sometimes, in an effort to assuage children’s fears, parents will assure children of things that may or may not come to pass. For example, parents may tell their children that “your new school will be wonderful!” or “you will make so many friends right away.” Instead, address your children’s concerns without varnishing them with promises, and let them know you will be there for them if they find things difficult.

5. Be flexible in your communication

Communication is a significant factor in a successful move, and it’s important to be open to the various styles and types of communication that different children have. Some children really don’t or can’t talk about their feelings specifically, but that does not mean you should not communicate with them about the move.

Pay attention to body language and other signs that your child is not happy (or happy). Then address their feelings in a way that is comfortable to them. Younger children may act out their feelings using their toys or puppets. Many a parent has found that a child can communicate to and through puppets more easily than talking directly to the parents.

Moving really can be an exciting adventure if you approach it with the right attitude.