How a Special Goodbye Routine Can Help Separation Anxiety

When school starts, and you’re sending off a new student on her first day a full day school, you may have to deal with separation anxiety. If you have other children you may be an old pro at this. However, if this is your first child, you may want to know how a special goodbye routine can help separation anxiety for you and your child.

You’ll want to prepare your child for their first day of school by taking them by to visit well ahead of their first day. This will let them see where they’ll be for a good part of the day, allow them to meet their teacher, see where they’ll sit, and become familiar with the layout of the school. You can also prepare them by creating a special goodbye routine that only the two of you share.

A goodbye routine can be anything you both agree upon. A kiss on the cheek followed by a pat on the back; it can also be a hug and a “go get ‘em tiger” before they get out of the car. Anything that can ease their, and your, apprehension will do the trick. Don’t forget to say “I love you” and let them know you’ll be there to pick them up at the end of the day.

Why is a goodbye routine an idea to consider? The truth is, despite your best efforts to convince them otherwise, your child may be scared that you won’t return after you drop them off at school. Some degree of separation anxiety is to be expected, particularly if your child is on the younger side of school age. Here are other things you can do to ease the anxiety:

* Try not to talk about how your child will be without you during the school day. In fact, doing so may increase the difficulty for both of you.

* Smile and act as normal as possible as you’re walking them to class. Talk about how excited it is to be going to school and what a great day they’ll have. Be sure to tell them goodbye using your special goodbye routine.

* To make separation easier for them, give them something of yours, or a photo of you, to keep during the day. If they start missing you they can look at your picture or the object and it’ll bring a smile to their face.

* Practice runs can be helpful. Take your child to a friend’s or to grandma’s house and leave them there while you go out to run errands. This will help them learn that you may leave but that you’ll always return for them.

* Plan how you can separate easily. Walk them to class their first day and plan to stick around for a few minutes. When you realize your child isn’t fixated on you, turn and walk away calmly.

* Stay strong for them. If they see you cry they’ll be more likely to follow suit. Try to hold back the tears until you’re in the privacy of your own car.

It’s normal for children to have some separation anxiety when school starts. Learn how a special goodbye routine can help separation anxiety. Before long, you may find your child eagerly looking forward to school and spending time with their new friends.